Shaheer Ahmed
Note: This is a satire and spoof article. Some of the facts might have been made up.
Metaverse! The perfect scam for Facebook to avoid massive lawsuits while still stealing the data, and somehow convince some retards that the Black Mirror dark sci-fi is coming to life. Luckily, many of us who weren’t met with live zombies in the Covid-19 pandemic didn’t buy into the crap that Facebook was selling. Also, Facebook’s big evil plan of putting us into giant simulations doesn’t really operate according to common sense. First, you have a cellphone that is literally a tracking device. Secondly, you really aren’t that important that the corporate techs will want to insert their million-dollar setups for free, just to watch a guy dreaming about stopping a terrorist attack on his office with his bare hands. That’s right! We know everyone thinks like that.
But, coming back to Metaverse! Considering what kind of atrocities that the concept is building, another Japanese company has decided to join the circus by unveiling its plans. H2L Technologies is backed by Sony Tech, and they have just come up with a small metaverse wrist band. Wearing this wristband is going to drop you in a world full of pain. Like literally! Merely wearing it will allow you to feel actual physical pain if anything happens to you in metaverse.
Their technology will allow you to feel the actual weight of the object along with its size in real life. Electrical simulations are used to manipulate the arm and muscle mimic sensations. Where this might be seen as one of the advances in technology, like tiktok, this might come to bite you in places you haven’t fathomed yet. And thanks to those Japanese jerks, you will now be able to feel the pain if someone hits you with a truck in the metaverse. It seems the company’s attempt to release you from the constraints of time, space and location will also free you from your actual body.
Do I really need to tell you how this is going to be troubling for you? First of all, it has become common knowledge that metaverse has no legs for its avatars. The only way to deliver the exact pain is to make you feel like you were extending your legs over the train’s railway and then the automobile passed. Suppose if we keep things unrealistic here, even then, the technology will continue to ruin your metaverse experience.
How? Do you know that metaverse has more dating and catfishing options? Imagine if you actually land a date and he/she finds out. That other person is bound to pick up something and hurl it on your face. Thanks to Japan, you will not be able to get away with that at all.
Implications don’t end here. Now if you tip over or hit your head somewhere, thanks to modern technology, you will not only feel it but you might also pass away from the pain. With that kind of technology, it won’t be long before we might experience robberies where people will rob a store with a baseball bat or even guns. Doesn’t that sound wonderful?
