Shaheer Ahmed
One can never tell the difference between the reel and real-life when it comes to brown families. Endless stories with major twists and turns. Ak time par akar actors bhi thak jatay hain but these real life people who are no less than reel life actors and actresses, see no bound. There is always something going on in the desi families, especially the aunties. Desi aunties always have something new in the bag which never ceases to amaze us. Akhir itna content latay kahan sei ho? Just like types of desi aunties at Eid dawat.
Desi Ami and Personal Space – No Mix At All
Just to be clear these are the same old aunties that you have been seeing since your first day on Earth and will continue to meet till your last. But it’s hard to deny that without these aunties things get a lot less entertaining though easy but less entertaining. In this article, we pay a tribute to all the desi aunties who come up with different ways to entertain us till our eyes get welled up often called tears of happiness (hard to agree with) but yes be that as it may be. Even on the auspicious day like Eid they grace us with their presence and million dollar opinions which we all appreciate from the bottom of our hearts, don’t we?
The chill khala/phopo
Although a rare kind, in every desi family you have at least one cool khala or phopo. If you have two then my friend you are the luckiest person alive but if you have none we don’t know how you are still breathing fine. Hard to find but easier to identify. The one that looks ravishing, holds an iphone and is taking pictures with you guys is the coolest aunty at the Eid Dawat. In majority she appears to be the one giving Eidi like she owns the world bank. If you see one, go and hang out with her at least she’ll bring a lot less drama in your life.
The gossip queen
Even the queen Elizabeth can’t beat the gossip queen of a desi family, not in gossip and certainly not in age. She will be the most active participant of your family. The one talking about people and their life and at the end will say ‘hamain kia’ or ‘hum tou logo ki islah kar rahay hain’. Not to mention she is also the one with everyone’s dark secrets including your 2 year old nephew. Beware to never cross with her.
The diet freak/ Problem with food
We always have that one aunty at the Dawat table who has a problem with every eatery that is present on the table. She will be the one who has the most healthy eating diet and will advice people around to eat Lettuce a.k.a salaad kay patay Instead of chicken karhai. At that time you ask yourself twice, am I fasting?
The fasadi type
Try not saying salam to her first….. She is the one who’ll get offended by everything seriously. You are breathing that’s a problem and even if you are not then believe us that would be a problem too. You have to be especially careful around this type and in that nanosecond where you intentionally made eye contact with her, know that you won’t be able to make eye contact with anyone ever again. That’s how she is going to roast you in front of everyone.
The brand ambassador of ‘taunts.com’
She will be the one having a glass of coke in one hand and will be leaning back waiting for the right opportunity to tell you how bad your Eid ka jora is or how fat you look. They also sometimes turn into a rishta aunty. Out of habit she once asked my father beta shaadi hogai hai tumhari. What to say to them when they ask us about our shaadi. Hogai hai aunty bas ap ko nahien bataya?
 The bragger
Last but not the least the biggest bragger in the world and believe us no one can flaunt better than her. She’ll be the one telling everyone on the table that she bought her Eid’s dress from Paris, shoes from London, and handbag from Bermuda triangle. Yes, she’ll even bring the Bermuda triangle to Pakistan and no one we repeat no one will be able to contest her.
